All posts by Seitan Himself

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New Privilege Checkpoint at Coolidge Bridge raises Traffic Concerns

Officials Suggest Limiting Stops to Subarus; Connecticut Plates Northampton, Massachusetts “As a white person I know it’s important to examine institutionalized racism and its relation to wealth and identity, but in all honesty I’m late picking up the kids at charter school,” complained Hadley resident Willow Schnell, “I’m a huge supporter of Black Lives Matter, […]

Northampton Human Rights Commission Called Before United Nations Human Rights Commission

Hiring Practices Deemed ‘Cruel, Unusual’ Northampton, Massachusetts In a rather ironic turn of events, the U.N. decided to investigate the “enhanced vetting process” now employed by the City as it attempts to fill several vacancies on its volunteer-staffed Human Rights Commission. The investigation was launched after the local newspaper conducted a particularly exacting social media […]

Amherst to Replace Town History

Amherst, Massachusetts Audience members gave the Amherst selectboard a standing ovation when they unveiled their plans for a new town history at last week’s meeting. “I think it’s time for a new, more progressive history,” said Donna Eriksson, an alderwoman from South Amherst. “At first, we only wanted to change the town’s name. But once […]